Friday, January 16, 2009

Iguanas are living in the past


Not to be a dick or anything, Iguana, but you're not a fucking dinosaur. I know you roam around showing off your scaly skin, beady little eyes, and your nose holes. And yes, I've seen your tongue. But let me ask you a few questions. Can I ride you? Do you have answering machine messages from Steven Spielberg? WERE YOU ON MY SHOES WHEN I WAS EIGHT???

So don't waddle or slither or whatever you do over here and pretend that you rule the earth. WELCOME TO THE QUATERNARY PERIOD, IGUANA.

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